Narcissists are always operating from their false self. They are empty shells needing to be filled by something, someone. This is why narcissists are addicted to people, also referred to as supply.
Nacissists addiction is people, they’re always ready for the next fix. They need the newness of another person. I know it feels personal when they treat you like trash. Just know that it’s not personal. It’s literally the narcissist’s survival mechanism – if it’s not you, it’ll be someone else.
How Narcissists Feed Off Their Addiction
They are great at hiding their mental issue from you. You were getting to know false persona they were creating for you. The narcissist was actually mirroring you, for the best chance of securing your source of supply.
The next person (supply) is always the saviour and past supply becomes the enemy. There always has to be this contrast for the narcissist. They need to cover the shame they feel about how they treated the supply they discarded with blaming them for the relationship failing. The new supply becomes the new shiny object.
Narcissists have this inner addiction to the newness and adrenaline of meeting someone new.
Narcissists are in a state of mania when they meet someone new. All their focus and attention goes there, hence why they disappear. They haven’t got the energy to properly focus on more than one supply. The love bombing takes a lot of work! It also takes a lot of energy to “coach” someone into submission.
When Narcissists Exhaust Supply Source
At some point though, they will get tired, burn out and jump ship. They have exhausted that source of supply. Whatever way you filled that void has expired and it’s time for a taste of something new. This is why people are the narcissists fuel. This is why narcissists are addicted to people – they can’t survive without them.
You’ve probably noticed the narcissist’s pattern of not being able to sustain a long term relationship. Narcissists are on a perpetual cycle of feeding off other people’s source of being and energy. After the discard, if they don’t get someone else in place, they breakdown or are forced to face that fact that they are the issue.
Narcissistis are sprinters, not marathon runners. They never intended to be in the relationship for the long haul. Nothing lasts too long for them, as they are always anticipating things ending -usually in a heartless discard.
If you don’t get rid of them or them you, the abuse will get worse, as in their mind, they are done with you. Once you see the signs like, inconsistency, silent treatments and disappearing acts with no valid reasons – that’s the best time for you to step out of the relationship.
It usually only takes 3-6 months before the mask starts slipping and the new supply really picks up on those red flags. The narcissist can sense when this is happening, so starts focusing their time on securing a brand new source of supply.
Narcissists leave behind a lot of carnage, pain and damage in their trail. Know that it’s not about you. It’s about their need to constantly hit that high through others. I know it hurts, so I hope this helps you change your perspective, even a bit.